**This post is not intended to be judgemental or negative.
For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be a mom. Growing up, I babysat from the age of 12...children of all ages. I have been fortunate to be the kind of girl that can easily sooth fussy babies...(could be that I am quite squishy and comfy) :). I have always loved kids.
From the time I was in 4th grade, I wanted to be a teacher. I LOVE school supplies, kids, books and schedules. I love summers off, 2 weeks at Christmas, and teacher gifts. I love being the boss and I love to talk. Thankfully, what I wanted and what God planned for me have been in sync for 6 years now. I am about to start year 7 of teaching...and...wait for it...I couldn't be more excited!
Does that make me a bad mom? No...I already know the answer...it does not. Will I have times that I would rather stay home with my girl?...absolutely. Will I miss her so so much?...of course.
BUT...I have learned over the last month (1 month tomorrow!!) that I was not created to be a stay-at-home-mom. Don't get me wrong...I wasn't nieve enough to think that SAHM's sit on the couch and eat bon-bons all day, or are able to watch all the good day-time shows while they surfed the internet. I knew all of that...but...I had NO CLUE what would be expected of me as a SAHM for over a month. NO CLUE!
The sad part is that it isn't expectations that are put there by anyone but myself. I cannot be settled unless EVERYTHING is done. Laundry, bottles, clean kitchen, clean bathrooms...etc. I can honestly say that I don't notice most of this while working full time...somehow though it always got done. Now though, I am a mad woman throughout the day...(typing this blog is starting to make me feel guilty for sitting down so long...I am thinking of all the stuff that MUST be done...my definition of MUST).
I admire SAHM'S for sure. But as much as I admire them...I am thankful that God has called me to something different. I am curious to see what my posts will say after I go back to work on the 30th. Stay tuned!
Until next time,
Sam
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3 comments:
Sam - I'm totally in the same boat. When we adopt, I'll stay home for 5 weeks, my husband is going to stay home with the baby for 5 weeks and then we're both going back to work. I love my job and my career is important to me. Of course, I love being a parent too. I think you can love, and do both well. It's just all about multitasking, that's all. Good luck in your journey!
Ok, this post didn't show up on my reader until tonight...but the one-month one was there last week! Weird! Hopefully you didn't think that I wasn't commenting on purpose...since I'm that wacky SAHM!:) I'm TOTALLY kidding:)
I think that you're right...God makes people desire different things. He made us both desire to be moms, but that doesn't mean that it makes either one of us a "better" mom than the other for staying home or working...it means that we're different, and what we enjoy doing all day is different. I was just thinking this week that I missed inservice (the talking, the decorating, the planning, the organizing), but I so did NOT miss the first day of school or what comes after it! I can't believe that I'm getting paid to watch kids and be with my girl, and I don't dread it and drag myself out of bed like I used to do for the past five years of my life. I think it has to with where we both are in life, too, and the experiences we've had. You will probably be a BETTER mom for going back to teaching because you're doing what you love, just like I'm a better mom for staying at home because that's what I love. Heck, that's what I loved LAST year when I watched kids at my house and K wasn't even here yet! Does that make sense? It's all about what God puts in your heart that fulfills His purpose for you, and I'm glad you're doing it! Love you!
And P.S....you weren't judgmental or negative:)
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